Friday, July 3, 2009

Wolverine: Illfated Movie Production

Sure comic books are not the smartest form of entertainment, especially the ever popular super hero genre that is the synonym for the comic book insustry as it is, but with shows like Big Brother and bestsellers like the Twilight saga, one is really not in position to judge the intelectual quality of whatever we read or watch. That being said I knew that Wolverine was a movie with very little merit or historical value to leave a major mark on the movie landscape. It's purpose was to be awesome and give us a CGI representation of all the battle scenes with super powers that fans read about and played off in their heads. I am not sure how Hollywood managed to screw up with that simple concept.

Fact is, Wolverine sucked big time and no matter how good and fitted for the role Hugh Jackman is, the man couldn't save this movie from ultimately failing to arouse any positive reactions. To those, who are not Marvel geeks, the movie has a very unsatisfying plot. To those, who are Marvel geeks, the movie more or less will cause mild suicide tendencies and distrust to every future comic book adaptation in the making. I am not a particular expert in the Marvel timeline, so Wolverine is a pretty shady picture, but I know enough to spot major clashes with his origins. It feels like the movie studios simply decided to rewrite the character and the Marvel mutants so that they can fit everything in a very easy way that is really lame.

I call this death by bad writing. Wolverine and Sabertooth were never really that close to begin with in the Marvel universe and the whole brother thing is as unlikely as a black hole and matter to be on friendly basis. Either way even if they did have a strong connection and boy in the movie they made it through so many wars, that connection can't really be cut so fast with both feeling no remnants of brotherly affection towards each other. Illogical as hell, if you ask me. Then we have Wolverine's keen senses that somehow are left out in the whole movie. It is known that he can smell it out when you lie and can pick up life signs in a very near dead person, so neither will Silver Fox's fake death or Starks' lies pass, if that aspect of Logan's powers was acknowledged and it was, but when Silver Fox confessed her true love. Then he smelled truth, but only as a device so that the movie can have a dramatic ending.

Gambit was really bad written character, whose main function was only to interrupt wolvies and tooths battle, so that the movie can continue. Emma Frost shouldn't have been there, since at the time she was a teen she lived in a mega mansion and thought family politics and was a weak telepath. Diamond skin came way later only after she was through with the Hellfire club or somewhere during her involvement with it. Scott Summers didn't have the ruby glasses, until he met professor X and that supposedly [hinted by the final scenes] happened only after he was involved in the whole mutant experimentation scheme.

As you see I am nitpicking everything to the smallest detail, not because it's fun to point out mistakes to people, but because to us, partial to Marvel's creations, these are just hard core facts that spring in our mind like basic mathematics. And we pay the movie industry to entertain us with something we love, which is then twisted and stripped bare of all that made us love it. Just to milk money. If you don't believe notice how nobody spills blood and wolvie's claws are unstained after gutting people. All for the sake of PG-13 ranking.


WitchEmber said...

I've heard that Hollywood is currently releasing "canon" and "non-canon" versions of Marvel properties.

"Ironman" and "The (new) Hulk" are considered canon (approved) and will have actual tie-ins with the appropriate books. (Also included are the planned Thor and Avengers movies.)

"Wolverine," "X-men," "Spiderman," and "Punisher" are non-canon and have no connection to the Marvel mythos beyond the initial IP.

The one highlight for me in "Wolverine" was the bonus ending that some screens offered, showing Wolverine in Japan and suggesting that's where his next adventure will be based. Wolverine vs ninjas FTW!

(word verification: guallita)

Harry Markov: daydream said...

Now that would explain some why these movies shy away from the comic book versions. I would have liked to have heard this, so that I would have been prepared, because then it would have been an entirely different review and movie as a whole for me.

Oh and I so want ninjas.

T.D. Newton said...

Didn't HATE the movie, but couldn't really enjoy it completely. PG-13 always leaves a sour taste in my mouth because it had the potential for much more. The writing definitely killed it, but also the unwillingness to include all the necessary violence for the Wolverine character. Seriously. The video game based on this movie was WAY violent (based on the two video reviews I watched on it). The movie, basically, got neutered. Lame.

Dude, I just saw the new Transformers. WAAAAY worse than Wolverine. The new Terminator movie is actually quite good.

Harry Markov: daydream said...

I can't say that I hated the movie. It was the unwillingness to take some chances and just go with it that drove me insane. If the PG-13 wasn't an issue then I am sure the writers would have had the creative freedom to at least bring it on in terms of bad-ass-ery.

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